Many men lament that upon having children, he loses his wife.

Without doubt, children are demanding and the effort to care for them, exhausting.  The love of children is usually unconditional – and many women move children up in priority, placing their husband’s to a less important place. Relationship tip:  MEN NOTICE AND THEY DON’T LIKE IT!

This feeling is Biblical.  Children are from your body, but your husband and yourself become one body.

Genesis 2:24  “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” (NIV)

In the story of Hannah, at this point, childless; is asked innocently by her husband if she does not value him more than if she had 10 sons.  Here is that passage:

1 Samuel 1:6-8   “Peninnah, her rival, would torment and humiliate her, because the Lord had kept her [Hannah] childless. This went on year after year; whenever they went to the house of the Lord, Peninnah would upset Hannah so much that she would cry and refuse to eat anything.  Her husband Elkanah would ask her, “Hannah, why are you crying? Why won’t you eat? Why are you always so sad? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?”

Ladies, if you are not careful, and deliberate about it, your children could easily become substitutes for the love deposits you used to give to your husband, leaving him with an empty void where you used to fill.  Do not create weakness so that he is easily tempted to fill that void elsewhere.

Keep it HOT!

one body, husband, marriage,



  1. I have actually been studying Hannah as I am her struggling with her same issues and heartbreak. This passage serves as a reminder when my heart yearns for a child that my marriage is #1 and that children are of God, not of us. God has a plan for all of us, and sometimes that plan does not look like our own – but we must trust that His plan is even better than our own. And He will provide us many blessings. 🙂

  2. But of course…, as long as you do not ignore your hubby and push him to a place of less priority in the process. Kids will leave and cleave to their spouse. You and your hubby are extensions of each other, or should be.

  3. Having a special needs child, I've more often than not put him before my husband. As I've grown closer to the Lord, I've made a point to be more aware when I'm doing this as I want to set an appropriate example for my son to follow. Thankfully my son is a young adult now so it's much easier. Even still, my husband has always been very understanding and it's not been an issue between us.

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